Thursday, 24 November 2011

UXM #145: "Kidnapped!"

(Doom with a view.)


It's not every comic that starts at a ballet.  Props for originality there.  Ororo has taken an ill Kitty's place in escorting Stevie Hunter to a show as a late Christmas present, but they're only halfway through the adagioes when Arcade's flunky Miss Locke bursts in.  Seems Doctor Doom has kidnapped her boss for some reason (presumably he finds Arcade just as aggravatingly tiresome as I do), and Locke wants the X-Men to spring him. 

Since Locke is holding the Greys, Moira, Illyana, and both Angel and Nightcrawlers' girlfriends, there doesn't seem to be any way for Storm to refuse, especially since Locke doses her with poison to cover her escape, and steals Stevie with her for added insurance.

Having checked that the people Locke claims to have kidnapped are actually missing (smart), she heads home.  Xavier calls Beast to get hold of the Avenger's file on Doom, which smells a little too much like capitulation for Logan's tastes.  Our diminutive psychopath takes the "no negotiating with terrorists" line.   Which I guess isn't an entirely watertight argument - it's a lot easier for criminals to notice a country caving to extortion than a superhero team, but it's still a good point.  I can't help noticing that Mariko is safe and sound, though.

At any rate, Storm has a plan - send the current team to Doom's spare castle in the Adirondacks, whilst a crack team of former members finds Murderworld and burns it to the ground. Xavier calls up Bobby, Alex and Lorna, and Sean, but can't reach Scott (because he's shipwrecked in the Bahamas, but we'll get to that tomorrow).

The teams go their separate ways.  Storm arrives in the courtyard of Doom's swanky mountaintop New York castle (formerly "Toadworld", apparently - it's so nice to see former supervillains going straight) and demands Arcade's release.  You have to admire her metaphorical cohones, and Doom certainly seems to appreciate them (amongst other things), inviting her in for a spot of dinner.  "My chef sets a superb table.  He dare not do otherwise."

Whilst Ororo distracts the former ruler of Latveria, the rest of the team sneaks their way in.  They find their way to what should be Arcade's cell, except, inevitably, it's a trap.  Doom's been monitoring them since they arrived.  Only his desire to flirt with Storm seems to have kept anyone alive, and that's about to get tiresome as well (for a sorcery wielding super-genius, Doom has never had much of an attention span).  The X-Men defeat the welcoming committee and head to rescue Storm, but they're too late.  Doom and his house guest Arcade (he was never a prisoner!  Psyche!  That never made any sense anyway!  Though neither does this!) have turned her into a statue.  The cads!  Then they set fire to Wolverine's costume.  The bounders!

Oh, also, everyone we like gets knocked unconscious and captured.  Unfortunate.


This issue begins in the evening, and takes place over approximately twenty four hours.

It takes around two hours for a modern ferry to get from Florida to the Bahamas, so it's entirely possible that Cyclops and Lee are shipwrecked on the same day they set off from Shark Bay.  That in turn means that we can set this issue as beginning on the day following the death of Lee's father, assuming she's the sort of person who'd want to throw herself into her work whilst she waits for the funeral.

Bobby Drake is described as a college sophomore, which would most likely make him in the school year in which he turns from nineteen to twenty.  Our timeline actually has him as close to his twenty first birthday, but it's not hard to imagine him having taken a gap year to beat up various hoodlums.


Sunday 6th to Monday 7th of February, 1983.


X+4Y+313 to X+4Y+314.

Compression Constant

1 Marvel year = 3.62 standard years.

(Shadowcat is 22 years old.)
Remember when people actually looked
forward to watching Heroes? Crazy times, man..
Contemporary Events

Harry Boot passes away, aged 65.  Boot was one of the three UK inventors of the cavity magnetron during the Second World War, a device which allowed radar systems to be miniaturised to the point where submarines and escort vessels could carry them.  Not surprisingly, this proved critical in the war effort.

Standout Line

"We can't protect all those we care for.  We'll always be vulnerable that way.  Our only chance is ta stop it before it starts.  We fight back!  We make certain no-one ever tries ta get at the X-Men this way again -- by makin' the price of doin' it too high ta pay."

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