Wednesday, 21 September 2011

UXM #94: "The Doomsmith Scenario!"

(Cats, blackbirds, and wolverines.)


And so... it begins!  Chris Claremont has arrived to mould the X-Men according to his vision, and in doing so create the bedrock that still holds up the series to this day.

First item on the agenda is writing out the '60s X-Men - all but Cyclops.  I always thought their reason for leaving - to "live their own lives" made absolutely no sense, but since the book couldn't really support thirteen mutants simultaneously (Sunfire having already quit like a bitch, as mentioned yesterday), I can see why it had to be done.  At least Cyclops refusal to leave, ostensibly because of his fear of hurting people, though I don't think we're supposed to believe that, works well.  Jean doesn't come across as too sensitive, though. "Now that you've risked your life to save us, I'm abandoning your surrogate father.  You coming, or do you just never want to see me naked?"

But Scott stays, and it's a good job he did, because after a few weeks of putting the new team through their paces in the Danger Room (featuring the welcome return of the world's gayest robot), Count Nefaria suddenly appears on the scene and swipes control of the US nuclear missile system.  Nefaria has to be one of the most brilliant super-villains around.  It takes a unique kind of twisted genius to put together a team of henchmen that make this bunch look impressive:

but dammit if he wasn't the little Count that could.  The ani-men make his last bunch of back-stabbing doofuses look like the Sinister Six.  Sure, Gort's strength is handy, and I presume Croaker has some kind of advantage as regards agility, but what about the others?  Dragonfly is so stupid she can't even remember the Count sent them to NORAD in the first place, the guy with an eagle's head doesn't say anything, and what the hell was Nefaria thinking when he decided the best superpower for his cat-man was the ability to grow a ginger beard?

Good job he has Valhalla's defences to fall back on, I guess.  Scratch one X-jet! 

(It got identified as an SR-71 Blackbird this issue, as well, though it doesn't really look much like one.  We can now officially begin our count of the number of Blackbirds the X-Men manage to total over the years).


This issue begins the day after the X-Men return from Krakoa, but between that mission and their departure for Valhalla, the team go through weeks of training.  The phrase "week in, week out" suggests a fair amount of time has passed.  We also need to consider how long it takes for Hank to get to Canada, fight the Hulk, and become an Avenger.  We'll assume the training takes a full month, then. 

That puts us into early December, but I think we can get away with that, the green trees we see in this issue seem to be evergreen in any case.


Friday 7th November to Sunday 7th December, 1980.


 X+2Y+221 to X+2Y+251.

Compression Constant

1 Marvel year = 4.43 standard years.

(Iceman is 26 years old)

"Listen, midget, one more word
out of you and..."
Contemporary Events

Voyager I passes Saturn.

A TV record is set by the number of people who tune into Dallas to learn who shot J.R.

Ryan Gosling and John Terry are born, and Mae West passes away.

Standout Line

"The Avengers couldn't make it.  We're the X-Men."  Poor Scott.  He spends three years of his life fighting evil, and all it gets him is a job as ringleader to the Avengers' understudies.  Not to mention the fact that said superhero team have already allowed one of his former subordinates to join, due to him having the special power of Being Very Blue.

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